Growing

Growth, it seems, had a lot to do with weeding out things. Listening more to what God is speaking into your heart than anything else. As A and I spoke the other day as we were driving to Phx, we can both see God's hand growing us through this time in our life. Since welcoming E into our lives, we have wrestled with a surprising amount of "junk" and, honestly,  I'mean thankful. I'm thankful for the difficult situations we have faced and that we have been given no other choice thand to cling first to our Jesus and second to each other. As we navigate life as a family of 4, we are learning much and rejoicing for more. Life is moving and it's moving fast and my heart overflows as we look back, look forward and we look here and see God in it. 

The biggest thing God has been working on me is my fear of man. I am so concerned with how others will feel and how they will perceive me that I have frequently ignored God's leading in my life. Through some difficult conversations  and an amazing book by Jennie Allen (called Anything), He has not only been revealing my sin, but stripping it away - helping  me to let it go and rightfully place it where it should be - at the Cross. I am thankful. I am thankful for my Jesus who died for my sins that I continue to struggle with even though I don't deserve such an incredible act of mercy and grace. I am thankful for my husband who helps me to be better and leads me to Jesus when I am being stubborn. I am thankful for our girls who have brought so much joy and love to our lives and continue to push me to be a better mommy, wifey and person. I am thankful for our church family who walk with us and encourage us. I am thankful for the beautiful design of marriage and family. I am thankful for this beautiful life God has abundantly blessed us with. I am thankful for this everchanging, wonderful, inspiring adventure that is our life. 

I'm learning to stick up more for my family and myself instead of worrying about pleasing everyone. I am learning that sometimes things need to change so things can get better.  I am learning more about the person God has created me to be instead of the person others decide I am for me. And I owe it all to God and my husband. I am thankful. I am blessed. I am overjowed and I cannot believe that this beautiful life is the one He chose for us to have. ♡